By: Sarah Wilson L.Ac., MAOM
Given the uncertainty of our times, patience is an important quality that can help to keep our lives, families, jobs and health running smoothly. In particular, the use of patience can't be overstated enough when facing the challenges present in the ups and downs of infertility.
We wait with uncertainty week after week, month after month or year after year for anticipated outcomes with whatever method of treatment we are choosing to increase the ability to conceive and expand our families. With waiting, impatience, anxiety and frustration are often in the mix. For me, the key to increasing the quality of patience is in impatience itself.
Here is a small and simple example: when driving and sitting at a stoplight for what seems an eternity, my attitude gets tight and narrow, my shoulders raise up to my ears and my hands begin to grip the steering wheel with more force. Frustration, the rushing rev and impatience are certainly in the mix here--almost as though I can’t do this ingrained habit any other way. I’m on autopilot with impatience!! The tightness in my body and agitation in my thoughts rises up in a situation I have no control of at all. How often does this happen...a lot!
Evidently, impatience is a habit- it’s hardwired and it repeats itself over and over again. I make a mental note, that impatience isn’t helping and often just sets in motion a cranky mood and a feeling of stress. Over time it is mentally, physically and emotionally depleting. Impatience isn’t working too great. As soon as I notice the qualities of impatience, I think of how much I can be on autopilot and that default state of mind just sets me up for the domino effect of frustration and anxiety.
I see that within the effects of impatience….stress, unhappiness, tight muscles, the rushing rev….are the qualities of patience. To change takes moving out of auto-pilot and noticing these effects. Then I can move towards the calm, relaxed, accepting qualities of patience.